Still in my sleeping bag with the fresh coolness of nature caressing my cheeks, I find myself lucky and fortunate. To awake to such a beautiful understanding of reality as a first thought is more than magical. It painted my smile wide before I had even opened my eyes. And that is how my day started, with a warm thought bubbling the wellness of reality and creating feelings of a wildflower vision. Grinning and feeling internal peace I stretch my arms out of my sleeping bag and flex my toes down, like a cat just waking from a delightful slumber. I blink awake wiping the sandman’s gift from my eyes As I peer out the window towards the mountain range lying east, slumbering under its blanket of snow. I take in the weather report. Today, partly cloudy, chance of rain, or snow, the temperature somewhere close to freezing, and slightly windy at around five miles per hour. All of this and I didn’t even need an actual television or someone else to explain the current forecast to me.
I forgo the coffee and oatmeal and venture down the road to the restroom. My bladder is screaming at me and I need to answer its call. I’ll have breakfast immediately following. Dishes, as per the norm, are non-existent and I already know my day’s magical.
I spent today much like the previous, but add a treat, disc golf. The sun has provided enough energy to remove much of the snow from the course and it looks, from first glance, playable. I give it a go and am not without disappointment. Yes, it was muddy, but I thwarted much of it by playing early, i.e., 9:00 AM. I am grateful for this time as the weather could change tomorrow and dump a foot of snow, not melting for two weeks. Having this understanding only makes it that much easier to provide gratitude. After nine holes my arm is letting me know I haven’t thrown for half a year and need to take it slow. I listen, knowing I can return in the evening if I’m feeling more limber, but for now I should have lunch.
_autotone
I arrive at the point and am thankful I enjoy peanut butter and jelly so much; I don’t think I could keep a stove lit with this wind. I eat my sandwich as I walk and notice a trio of sea otters frisking about. I contemplate if they’ll let me close enough for a picture then decide the reward is worth the risk. I’m not wanting to disturb them, but they are in the harbor and displaying signs resembling courage, i.e., two boat workers have walked by them and they didn’t swim away. How lucky I am. Walking along the dock, crab boats on both sides, I can hear the playful squeals and splashing joy. I slowly move towards the aft of a rather large boat and peek around the corner. They’re three! I make eye contact with one and instinctively say “Salome” in my mind. The otter seemed to smile at me as if it knew and returned to playing. I took a few more tentative steps towards the blue water and found surprise as they meandered right up beside me. Ten minutes later I decide it’s time to say goodbye. I’ve appreciated them and now would like to give them space. As I turn around the name of a boat catches my eye. It says, “Time Bandit” and it has a skull and crossbones. I know this boat, it’s from the hit discovery show “Deadliest Catch”. I snap a picture acknowledging my luck and giving thanks before departing the docks entirely.
Now, it’s board game thirty. I go to my brothers and bring Elder Sign. It appears fairly simple and we should be able to learn it in a couple hours. This means we will probably run through the setup and rule book and actually begin the game tomorrow. Sure enough, this is what happens, only we throw dinner in the mix. We leave the game set up for tomorrow and I bid him farewell shortly after completing the rules. I want to catch the sunset.
I spend the last hour of my evening watching the sun sink below the edge of vision and go to try a new sleep spot. I’ll know tomorrow if I made a good choice.
“You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination” ~Ralph Marston
A howling of gentle pitter-patter roused me from sleep. I lift my head 12 inches off the silk pillowcase and peer, groggy eyed, out the window. The light is soft, low, and almost nonexistent in this early hour. The sun will be rising shortly, but it’s unlikely to be seen from my vantage; rain and wind are my companions. The clock on my phone reads 6:15 am and I can’t help but feel a pull from somewhere, like an invisible string attached to my innermost, tugging at my consciousness. I’ve slept well, the traffic non-existent. Sometimes the obvious is the most secluded.
I perform my daily breakfast routine, coffee and oatmeal, from the shelter of a nearby tree. The rain has morphed into a slight mist and doesn’t permeate my outer layers. I decide it’s best to eat in the driver’s seat, admiring the crashing waves, rather than test the power of a persistent brume. I crack the window, better voices can be soft, and decide to pick up the fishmonger’s tale (not the book title). After an hour and the cessation of rain, it’s time to stretch.
I decide to walk a more interior path versus one outlining the coast. It’s nice to keep the scenery varied and appreciated. As I arrive at the trailhead I look at the bear spray resting solemnly in the cup holder between seats and think, “The bears should be waking up soon”. With that thought, I choose to leave the spray where it lays and go on my way ;). The trail is currently in every condition imaginable, e.g., muddy, snow covered, icy, dry, missing, and covered in deadfall. Truly, I enjoy this diversity and welcome the enjoyment, but mostly it’s snow covered. I pass black spruce, alder, poplar, aspen, and white spruce along the way. The wildlife, exceptions being the ravens and magpies, remain elusive to my vision but are evident from their markings. Moose droppings periodically dot the trail, a few porcupine quills rest alongside the barkless base of an aspen, and lynx tracks scatter the snow like interstate interchanges. Nature is a beautiful place.
When I return to the car I make a peanut butter and jelly to satisfy my hunger and spend a little time at the trailhead. I must confess; it’s nice to just sit and relax after a walk. Leaving the wilderness I head back to town so I have enough service to call a friend. He’s a third shifter and it should be later in the evening where he is. I was lucky, he answered. I spent the next hour catching up and sharing in loves reunion. Sometimes warmth doesn’t come from a physical source.
The rest of my day is spent in quiet reflection upon the banks of a lady’s voice. Life is worth living.
“ Only in the present do things happen ” ~Jorge Luis Borges
Another beautiful day arrives, but today it is without the sunrise beginning; too many clouds are hanging in the sky, low and dark with the threat of release. I pull myself out of my sleeping bag, stretch, open the door, and inhale the salty smell of liberation from the rat race. I smile with the knowledge of knowing what it means to be true to myself, to follow the voice of internal dialogue, and to stand with courage among my fears and scars. I don’t know what a better life looks like.
I start my day with coffee and oatmeal, a routine breakfast both cheap and convenient. I spend ten minutes setting up the pocket rocket, boiling the water, making the instant coffee and oatmeal, and tearing everything down. The simple conveniences are enough to satisfy my hunger and bring gratitude for the meal. Especially one I didn’t have to retrieve from a treasure can. I complete my breakfast and head to the laundromat to get a shower and clean my clothing.
Unfortunately, I arrived an hour early, they’re closed. I spend the hour running to the bank, grabbing some more conditioner, and cleaning the vehicle. When I return to the laundry mat I try to be as efficient as possible. I put my clothes in the washer, which is 13 dollars a wash. Life above the 59th parallel. While my clothes are washing I get a shower, 30 minutes for 10 dollars, and clean myself. This is a reasonable price for a shower with provided linen. I have enough time to shave, brush my teeth, wash myself, and get all the knots out of my curly hair. I return the soiled linen to the hamper and move my laundry to the dryer. It’s only 4 dollars to dry, but 27 dollars for the total. More than I would like, but options are limited when staying in the smaller, more remote communities. It’s the way I travel. I’m just not a big city guy. In truth I like to keep it under 10,000 people and that’s my upper limit. With my chores done I go for a relaxing, but chilly walk.
As I pass driftwood and bull kelp from a former existence I can’t help but imagine where it came from. The kelp torn loose by a sea otter frolicking with its sibling and the driftwood a distant reminder from a life across the ocean. Neither is probably true, but neither might be inaccurate. This is life’s beauty revealed in opportunity. My thoughts are interrupted by the unmistakable sound of an eagle. Its juvenile age distinguished by its brown and white appearance accompanied with a beak dipped in black. The gulls, who had been in peaceful bobbing, spread their wings and take flight, returning after a couple minutes and the eagles departure. The rest of the walk was a calm meditation with soft music resonating from the ocean’s breath.
When I return to the vehicle I head over to pick up my brother and spend the evening with him. We’ll share this time together and, with work, improve the relationship we have been growing.
“The only source of knowledge is experience” ~Albert Einstein
I awoke this morning to a beautiful sunrise peeking over the mountains to my east and a dead battery in my car. Somehow the oranges and yellows were so calming I never got upset. Instead, I used my energy to make a cup of coffee and stay in my sleeping bag a little extra long. I wasn’t overly worried as I am in a place that sees a fair amount of traffic; plus a friend lives close by and I knew she would arrive shortly after a call. As I sipped my coffee and admired the conclusion of the day’s beginning I gave my friend a ring and she was happy to come assist.. At this point, I hadn’t even tried to flag anyone down and decided it would be best if I continued to enjoy the morning in a relaxing way. So I did exactly this. I finished watching the sunrise and enjoyed the company of a friend before venturing off to the library to write a letter and play a board game. If you’re curious; I played Arkham Horror LCG and failed epically. After which I walked my sorrows away on the beach.
When I arrived at the beach the sun was a brilliant white, high in an endless sea of blue. The light wind blowing from the west was just enough to keep me cool as I walked, but if I stopped, its chill became evident. I chose to walk north since the tide was going out. This is the only time you can venture this way as the sea reclaims the land on its return. I made it about half a mile when my phone gave a ding indicative of a message. “Do you have time for a talk?” is all I needed to hit the video chat button. Instantly I was connected to a friend in France. We spent the next hour chatting and enjoying the gratitude that is loves friendship. I am truly most thankful for such a beautiful human to help guide my path toward the auspicious consciousness evolution. It was at this point I turned around and headed back. I had walked about 3-4 miles, and lacking a fuel source i.e., snacks, I thought it best to return. Now, it’s close to dinner.
Once I return to the parking lot I grab my stove, pan, gas, and some food from the vehicle and head to the shelter house. I set my mini kitchen up, much to the surprise of the onlookers who obviously hadn’t seen anyone cooking outdoors in near-freezing temperatures. If I had waited until the sun was lower in the sky it would have been below freezing. Guess it’s just the way of life above the 59th parallel. In tradition to the region, I made sockeye my brother had caught off the coast of Yakutat. Although not copper reds they still packed a flavourful punch. In honesty though, I can’t tell the difference between copper reds, afognak reds, yakutat reds, or any other region. They all taste the same, delicious. The difference between store-bought and farm-raised, salmon is distinct. The flavor profile, color, and fat content are all more pronounced in wild, free-swimming, Pacific salmon. Concluding dinner I headed out to the ole sleeping spot tucked next to the ocean and away from the hustle bustle of the small town.
I spend the rest of the evening watching the sun sink in the west and paint the snowy range to the east with a glow a lightning bug would find envy. The calm meditative clear mind that accompanied was a welcomed treat to the fulfillment of a beautiful day. I also concluded, “ I don’t have bad days, only challenging days” and today was no such day.
“instead of cursing the darkness, light a candle for where we’re going. There’s something ahead worth fighting for” ~Neil Young
For approximately three and a half to four months I am privileged enough to live, and work, on a remote Alaska Maritime National Wildlife Refuge located in the Kodiak Archipelago. The island is home to Kodiak Bears, Elk, Deer, Otter, Ermine, Fox, Squirrels, Eagles, and a plethora of migratory avian, but I’m not here for these. I’m here for the Salmon. The aforementioned is a life perk.
From mid to late may salmon begin to return to their birth regions to continue the cycle of life through spawning. I’m fortunate enough to be employed in a field that allows me to observe this fascinating epoch with continued amazement; the repetitiveness never detracting from awe and wonder.
As I play witness to the slow color change of silver bullets, whizzing through the water with purpose intent. I can’t help but feel a sense of awe. These fish slowly, over the course of weeks, fill the waterways with vibrant hues of burgundys, pinks, and reds, creating refractions a diamond would envy. Just as summers transition to fall, the color of creations farewell sings on hues of all the salmon, even if only faintly. Then, like a northern wind blowing the change of season, they fall. The waterways, streaming with remnants of life’s beauty, provide free delight to many with an apatite. The sly fox and the forthright grizzly have no need to quarrel for enough is provided. Even the Eagle, with its domineering personality, seen in steely eyes of unwavering, fierce squawks, finds the need for hostility absent. All is balanced; a thanksgiving feast.
The entire process, spanning months, gives witness to the emerging bounty of natures delight. Morels come with the first fireweed shoots (Alaskan asparagus) and fiddleheads as the salmon swim silver. Although brief, there is plenty to go around. As the spring onion fades and broad, leafy greens take hold, a new forage begins. Curly Dock, Dandelion, Plantain, and Lambs Quarters cool the pallet with fresh crispness; flowers of a rose add a gift of tender sweetness. Now the salmon swim darker, a burgundy purple dance. As the seed starts to form the sweetest of desires is realized. Berrys make a triumphant return. The blueberries, dripping with morning dew, invite gratitudes reception while the salmonberries decide their color (red or orange). The watermelon berries hang like water droplets clinging to flowery petals, sharing their song with the world. And high above, the cloud berries sway with the elusive rarity of twilights kiss. The salmon, now red with fatigue, share their gift of life with all who wish to see.
There are no roads, no gas stations, no grocery stores, no cell phone reception, no internet, no cars, no sprawling metropolis of concrete, no smog filled clouds hanging like a slow poison in a snow globe, slowly suffocating the inhabitants, and there are no people. Only nature in its natural state, giving the gift of creation. So to Creation, I say, “thank you”.
“May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds.” ~Edward Abbey
Yesterday evening I was fortunate enough to share in the making of tortillas with my host family. The process itself was simple and delicious. It started with procuring the flour (harina) which we got from the local market, it was a generous two pounds. Next, we simply added water to make masa.
I originally thought masa was corn flour, but it isn’t. It’s actually the combination of water with the harina (corn flour) that creates the masa. This you kneed until it forms the correct texture. I correlated the consistency with pizza dough. Just my little way of trying to make it stick in my mind and not my hands. The kneading process took about five minutes and required adding water slowly, not all at once. As the desired consistency of the dough is reached we are now ready to make tortillas. Well, almost. We cut a piece of plastic wrap and laid it on top of the tortilla press.
This was to prevent it from sticking to the press. Now we are ready to press them. We took a small amount of dough, about half the size of a baseball, and placed it on the press. We then pressed down in the middle of the dough to help it spread better. Once that is complete you close the press and give it a few good up and downs to make sure the tortilla is flat. It was referred to as giving CPR to the tortilla and it worked wonderfully. Now that the tortilla was pressed flat we had to pound it out with our palm. The process is called tortear and requires a little stamina. Although it just may have been the amount we made that makes me think such. Anyway, after the tortear process, they are placed on a flat iron/griddle to cook. This process doesn’t take long but you are looking for something specific, the panza. The panza is a little bubble that forms on the tortilla as it cooks. I thought of when I was a child and would have a fried bologna sandwich and the middle would rise up. Same thing with the tortilla. Once the panza forms (bubble) you flip and let it finish cooking. The panza will remove itself when you flip it as well. After it’s done they are placed in a town where they are sorted and some are frozen. Others are left out. And that’s the entire process.
After the first one finished I was offered a tortila con sal. I quickly replied with, “no, se. que es consal?” I was offered a funny look until my host quickly figured out I wasn’t able to catch the pause between con and Sal. She quickly let out a laugh and said, “con… Sal”. I quickly fell into a fit of laughter at my fumble, but gladly accepted the correction. After the laugh, I had a fresh tortilla con sal. For simply being a tortilla with salt it was surprisingly good. Then when we finished I was offered another treat. A quesadilla. As they split the tortilla I instinctually asked, por que (why)? I had never seen a quesadilla made this way. They explained it was how they always made quesadillas. They simply cut the tortilla and fill the middle with cheese. They then throw it on the griddle for a minute and cut it in half to serve. The salty flavor of the queso was amazing. It was one of the best quesadillas I’ve ever had. I’m truly thankful for the gift of love this family is sharing with me.
“The fact that Westerners identify remote country as wilderness reflects their inability to conceive of occupying and utilizing an environment without fundamentally altering its natural state” ~Richard K. Nelson
Recently I had the opportunity to volunteer with a nonprofit rescue in the Galapagos Islands of Ecuador at the grassroots level. It was a welcomed experience with many opportunities for collaboration, synergy, collective and unique problem-solving, personal growth, cultural experience, language exchange, and at times, stress. The latter is far more infrequent in comparison to its non-counterparts. I’ll provide an example of the above.
I arrived in the Galapagos to a humid 31 degrees Celsius via LatAm and Avianca airlines. Both were a pleasure to fly with and were courteous and reasonably priced. I especially enjoyed the pillow and blanket with the free meal from LatAm. Avianca showed tremendous patience with my limited Spanish vocabulary while being able to laugh through the communication struggles. After departing the plane I found myself stuck in customs for about an hour. This was for two main reasons. The first was communication and the second was the 20 and 100 US dollars they demanded I pay to enter, which I didn’t have. The communication problem was answered after a short 15-minute wait when a very kind and fluent English-speaking coworker came to our relief. The second issue was a little more difficult. I had been misinformed, unintentionally, by the nonprofit on the waiving of the fee upon entry. It happens; this is a grassroots experience and we are all learning together. Turns out they were yet to be added to the exempt list so exempt I was not. And as I didn’t have the money requested for me, which was 20 dollars at first, we were at an impasse for a moment. I was informed there was an ATM around the corner where I could retrieve the money. So, after a quick trip around the corner, I returned with the 20 dollars. I paid the fee and was then informed there was now a 100-dollar fee associated with the entrance to the National Park. (all the islands are considered a national park so this is the entry fee to the park. The 20 dollars was the entry fee to the Galapagos, or at least that’s how I understood it). Back to the ATM I go, but this time it will not allow me to access my account; it’s been locked. I had tried to prevent this by informing my financial institution of my travel plans and dates, but alas it was unsuccessful. As I returned to the customs counter and expressed my conundrum no one really knew what to do. My phone didn’t have an Ecuadorian SIM card yet and the airport had no wifi. After discussing the situation the National Parks Employee on site came up with a reasonable solution. This is something not common in the United States which took me by surprise. His suggestion was he keeps my passport and takes it to the NP office in Puerto Ayora. When I get my banking situation resolved I can go to the NP office, pay the entrance fee, and reacquire my passport. Now that’s an equitable solution that considers the circumstances rather than being a rigid, black-and-white legislative approach. I accepted the offer feeling heard and appreciated. The US could take some pointers here.
Now that I had cleared customs I was boarding a bus to head over to Santa Cruz Island. The actual airport is on a small island beside the main island. I take the short 15-minute ride to the channel where I depart the bus and board a boat to ferry me across. My only luggage is a 20-liter backpack so I was able to carry it with me. Everyone else with actual luggage had to load it on top of a boat. Once on the opposite side of the channel, I boarded a second bus that would take me to my destination, the market and final stop in Puerto Ayora. This is the meeting point for my host and contact with the rescue. The bus ride takes about an hour and is uneventful except for my first sighting of the legendary Galapagos Giant Tortoise. When the bus stops at the port in Puerto Ayora and the driver hops off I assume this is the last stop. So I depart the bus and start looking for my host. After about 5 minutes of searching, I notice the bus is leaving and others have reboarded. It turns out I got off at the second to last stop and the bus driver had simply gone to the bathroom. After getting directions to the market from a wonderful abuela, thanks to the help of a translation app, I was on my way to the market. Five blocks later I arrived at the market and noticed the bus station. It was denoted by a white dry-erase board with departure times for the bus. A small wooden plank situation on top of two milk crates; one on each end provided seating for waiting riders and a small tarp attached to what appeared to be branches offered a decent amount of shade. It is here I stood in astonishment, looking around and absorbing the sight of produce stands, street vendors, and patrons interacting with sellers, relatives, and strangers. It was a world away from what I was accustomed to and reminded me more of a large “farmers market” as it is called in the States. The fresh produce provided an aromatic melody of poetic beauty which held me captive in astonishment until I heard a voice calling, “HOLA”. I turn around and see a smiling beaming with the vibrant energy of living a good life. This is my contact Jamie and from here, I am taken to the place I will be staying, introduced to two other workaway travelers, and given a small tour. The rest of the day was filled with smiles and a sense of joy and accomplishment for navigating the challenges associated with international travel.
Fast Forward a few weeks. I ventured into town to grab some ice cream in the evening after a rather long day of work. While at the ice cream parlor, I met a Swedish man named Adrian who I instantly clicked with. Oh, I had a scoop of chocolate and a scoop of coffee ice cream; I enjoy mixing them together. Over the next week, we would see each other frequently and develop a unique feeling of genuine appreciation for each other. We also departed the same day, unbeknownst to either of us, so we got to spend some time together at the airport before I waved a beaming smile and wished him well on his continued travels. It’s difficult to transcribe such intrinsic knowledge associated with knowing. Nothing I write can convey the expressiveness of the feeling we shared. On the same night, I went in for the ice cream I decided to stop by Jamie’s store and hang out. My internal guide suggested this as it would help me practice my Spanish and observe the different interactions with the customers. As I approached Jamie’s store she immediately greeted me with the same beaming smile she showed me on day one. She introduced me to a friend who was hanging out with her and we all started talking in Spanish and English; each teaching the other a little of our respective languages. Jamie’s mother also showed up to join in the fun. I had intended to stay for an hour. This however did not happen. I stayed for three hours laughing, learning, and loving. I felt included in a family I didn’t know and accepted for who I was. Even with my broken Spanish. They laughed as I mixed up words like mejor and mujer and I giggled and they tried to pronounce the letter V. We even created our first inside joke, Cheba. 😀 The fun was so intense Jamie was open almost an hour longer than she usually was and I missed the last bus back to the house. This meant I was walking, uphill the whole way, the three miles back to the house. There’s a bike path that runs the entire length that is lit and paved so it’s nothing unpleasant. I also had a good audiobook to keep me company (Mistakes were made but not by me: Carol Travis & Elliot Aronson). Jamie’s mother offered to take me, but I declined as the evening was nice and I desired to enjoy the sensation of walking. What a beautiful evening I had. Each day was a pleasant joy however; I found the most joy at Librería Legenda Bookery, Arts & Café
This little off-the-path cafe was my sanctuary for quiet, peace, and philosophical contemplation. Ash, a world traveler, and philosopher himself, always welcomed a good conversation, could listen and consider with intent to understand, and provided a delightful musical selection of vinyl, including poetry. His wife, Faith, has a plethora of culinary knowledge and always shared her beautiful authentic personality freely. I spent many hours reading, discussing, and enjoying the company, environment, and peaceful energy these two beautiful beings of creation created. I found a delightful book (The monk who sold his Ferrari; Robin Sharma) which I read while listening to musical legends such as the talking heads, Beethoven, the band, Fleetwood mac, and the west side story to name a few. If you ever find yourself on Santa Cruz island in the Galapagos you should consider stopping at Librería Legenda Bookery, Arts & Café. You won’t regret saying hello to Ash or Faith.
“I wish you joy and happiness. But above all of this I wish you love” ~Dolly Parton~
I didn’t get the best night of sleep. My mind wouldn’t slow down. I felt like a race car with bicycle brakes. So I utilized the help of breathing exercises, eventually finding a resolve. Unfortunately I was left feeling slugish the remainder of the day. I did manage to grab a few hours of sleep before my day started with me leaving the house shortly after eight in the morning. Good thing I didn’t have to start pre dawn or I might not have made it. As I was driving down the driveway to leave I noticed the clearness held by the atmohpere. There were no clouds hanging low or high and the haze that has been on the horizon is nonexistent. This means I can see the volcano. It sure is a pretty site. A little unnerving as well, but it’s all part of living in the ring of fire. The chances of it doing the volcano thing are slim so I dno’t give it a large amount of attention with my thoughts. I do however spend some time observing it with my eyes. With one last glance it’s out the driveway and down the road. I’m taking my brother to his new employment. I do hope he enjoys it.
The drive took about thirty five minutes and was beautiful the entire way. Up and down small hills, around bends that gave glimpsing views of glaciers and the bay, and through the shadows of a canopy threatening to dump its leaves. It is a remarkable drive and one I don’t mind making. Nature sure does help. After dropping my brother off I ran some errands, grabbed a chai, and came home to make a quick lunch. Nothing fancy, a turkey and cheese sandwich. I actually ate two. I then did some cleaning and headed off to go to work myself. It sure is pretty here. I had to make an unexpected stop as a cow moose and her calf decided to cross the road directly in front of me. It was super cool to be so close. They ended up stopping traffic in both lanes as speed wasn’t on their minds. From what I could tell most people didn’t mind. I could see the occupants of the other cars all raising cell phones for the inadvertent photo opportunity that was being provided. I was gawking too much to even think about taking a picture, but I’ll try better next time. The rest of the trip into work was uneventlful. Work however, wouldn’t be as lax.
Working in the mental health industry has had it’s ups and downs. The pros far outway the cons for me, but there are always times when the con presents itself. Yesterday was one of those days. I’ve set healthy boundaries while co-creating positive relationships which has helped tremendously to foster rapport with coworkers and clients. Nonetheless struggles are unavoidable, e..g., the stressfullness that comes with irrational, potentially combative behaviour when a situation is perceived as a crisis by an individual and aid person isn’t able or doesn’t understand how to deal with or address it. Often it leads to a fickle situation. Eventually though these situations pass and composure is regained. These situations can however leave a mark. It’s also part of the reason for my lack of sleep. I’m constantly questioning myself, e.g., did I make the right choice, could I have done things differently, was I helpful, should I have used different terminology, etc. etc.. I’ve also acknowledged that these types of situations can lead to burnout. I’m safeguarding against the latter by understanding my work is meaningful, valuing the impact I have on others, and appreciating the value tha clients have in me. We shall show how it goes. I’m still excited and eager to go to work every day, so I would say I’m doing alright. I must confess that I still need to work on “letting go”. Seems a litte challenging for an empath who desires to help, but I’ll get there. Perhaps I’ll share what I’ve discovered in my next blog post. Anyway After work I arrived home shortly before twenty three thirty and was drained. As you can imagine I grabed a snack and hit the sack. I was too emotionally drained to write a post.
Morning came too early today. I had a difficult night sleeping. My mind was heavy with thoughts of the past. The trickled in mid-day and didn’t seem to vanish. There was something there I needed to sleuth. I think I have concluded why and what I need to do. Not sure if I can follow through or not, but I will figure it out in the next few days. Anyway, there was a nice layer of frost today. I had to scrape the windshield. Nonetheless, it wasn’t bad. It didn’t take long for the car to heat up and I left early so I could get some cookies for a snack. I’ve been craving something sweet lately and can’t seem to find anything in the cabin that fits the description. So I bought some. It was a nice treat for myself. I also bought some bread and eggs while I was there. This would save me a trip after work. Work was nice today. Rather boaring as everyone watched football or slept most the day away. I did learn to play a little cribbage though. This was a fun reward. I must confess, my brain hurt afterwards. It’s a difficult game to learn but I was assured I would catch on within a month. Not sure if that means I’m a slow learner or it’s just that difficult. I’m going to split the difference and say a little of both. I also realized my life is full of fun houses as of late. When I’m not with my financial job I’m doing things on the preserve. Guess that’s why they say when you love your job it’s not really work. I arrived home tonight just in time to see the alpine glow creep up the snowy glaciers until it left only a shadow. I truly live in a beautiful place and one I’m beyond thankful for. Even walking out of the grocery store I found myself speaking the words “thank you” to no one in particular. Anyway, I chose to write this when I got home instead of waiting until bed. Just a littel change in the routine. It helps me keep things interesting. Anywho, until tomorrow 😀
The first thought I found this morning was, “the cranberries are going to be delicious”. The frost covered the grass and twinkled with a shimmer. I’ve got some work today on the preserve and I’m eager to get at it. I’ll be working on a rerout that will add a couple switchbacks to the descending and ascending trail. But before that, pancakes. Cinnamon nutmeg vanilla pancakes actually. I wanted a festive welcoming to accompany the frost. They were delicious. I ate four. While cleaning up breakfast I decided to go ahead and create some room in the cabin for a new indoor endeavor. We’ll see what happens. Until then it’s trail time 😀 I get the appropriate gear and dive head first into it. It sure was nice to get some miles in and enjoy the crisp, clean air. I also found some late season nagoon berries that I munched on. Not to mention the scenery was breathtaking. The trail itself is a little sloppy, but it’ll only get better. Hopefully it’ll make the ups and downs a little more enjoyable for the guests.
I didn’t see any wildlife, but I also didn’t expect to. Not with the equipment being used. Shortly after finishing the work I had a video chatt with part of the heart family. Their smiles are so darn contagious. I enjoy talking to Ben. He’s an honest kid. The video lasted roughly an hour and a half before I said good-bye. I sure do miss the heart family. Oh the check engine light I mentioned a few days back. It’s off. It never came back on. It lasted for about one hundred feet that beautiful day and that was it. No complaints from me about it. While I’m on side quests: my brother introduced me to a new type of nut butter. It’s an almond cashew with chia, pumpkin, and flax seed. Hands down my favorite. Pair it with bread and mulberry jam. You’ll be satisfied to surpass tantalizing. At least this was my truth. May not be yours though. Anyhow, after my video chat I put a piece of beef in the pressure cooker. It’s the simplest way I’ve found to make shredded beef. In two and a half hours, without any work, it’s ready to serve for a sandwich. Falls apart with a fork. I really do enjoy simple meals. Lol, I spent the entire time it was cooking asleep; the subtle beep of completion brought me to consciousness. I shredded some sharp cheddar and ate two pulled beefs. That’s my day. No dessert. My baking abilities hover around dreadful. I just can’t seem to get it down.
“Our destinies change if our thoughts are strong enough to create action” Me 😀
RighteouslyUnscripted 